Chicken Salad with a Kick

 Ah, chicken salad. A humble and often maligned dish. That's because it is pretty boring. I got lucky and was able to ramp chicken salad up. The nice people at Scott's Smoked Q (links at the bottom) were kind enough to send me a great big box of goodies to experiment with. (In full disclosure, they sent it to me and asked me to try everything out and post up my results. That was pretty much it. In the event you follow the link to their page and buy something, I will get a small commission.) 

    As we probably know, chicken salad ususally is mayonnaise based. This often turns off some people and occasionally leads to ugly fights over best brands or mayo vs. salad dressing. The world is already too divisive, so I have a simple solution. Ditch the mayo for this Alabama Q BBQ sauce. This works because the sauce is mayo based. But there's so much going on in this sauce, you wouldn't know. It has a vinegar tang up front, but finishes with a little spice. We also used their Original Rub on the chicken when cooking it to give it even more flavor. 

    I get that you may not have these rubs and sauces on hand, and you may not want to buy them. No worries, susbsitute your favorite rub or spice blend when cooking the chicken. Or just use a preseasoned rotisserie chicken. Go ahead and use mayo and whatever seasoning you like. It's all good. 

    That said, this is the route we took and we couldn't have been happier where it led. The Spud,who normally would not touch chicken salad, was more than happy to eat it when we swapped mayo for the Alabama Q sauce.

Ingredients

• 3 chicken breasts (about 1 lb total meat)
• Scott's Smoked Q Classic Dry Rub
• 1 small onion, chopped
• 1 stalk celery, chopped
• 1 tablespoon pickle relish
• 5 tablespoons Scott's Smoked Q Alabama Q sauce

Directions

1.  Apply the rub generously to the chicken and cook however you like (I smoked mine. Grilled would work, too. Or just chuck them in the oven at 375F [190C/Gas Mark 5] until the meat reads 165F/74C.)
2. Cut the chicken into small pieces. Throw them in a big bowl.
3. Add everything else into the bowl. Stir to incorporate ingredients and make sure the sauce has covered everything.
4. That's it. At this point you're done. Put it in a flour tortilla wrap with lettuce and shredded Italian cheese like we did. Throw it in a long roll like a lobster roll. Scoop it up with nacho chips. Just shovel it into your face with your grubby little hands. No one is looking. 

If you're want to check out Scott's Smoked Q, just click here

You can use the code "TFMCK" at checkout to save 10%!

I'm not saying this is the best way to have this, but this is how we did it, which makes it objectively the best method.
Good Times!

Too Damned Easy Vodka Sauce with Peppers

I find myself apologizing more than anything on this page. Work and life have most definitely gotten in the way of keeping up with my food pages. My school keeps switching between fully remote and hybrid learning, so I'm constantly shifting gears. The Wife's school has voted to go back to 4 days a week with full classrooms despite the fact that positivity numbers are through the roof. We've moved the Spud back to fully remote since her school will no longer guarantee social distancing of any kind. I won't even go into the nightmare of election anxiety. It's just been a shitstorm and I forgot about one of my core coping therapies: cooking. I got myself into the kitchen yesterday and I threw this recipe together from scratch. I may be falling apart at the seams mentally, but this was just the best vodka sauce I've ever had. I don't normally crow about my own cooking, but this was restaurant good. And I'm not talking Olive Garden. I'm talking a real Italian restaurant. Anyways, it was delicious and I hope you'll enjoy it as much as we did. Everybody take care and be well. As always, notes are in blue.

Too Damned Easy Vodka Sauce with Peppers

Ingredients

• 1 yellow bell pepper, diced
• 1 red bell pepper, diced (there's nothing stopping you from using 2 of one color, or even green, if you prefer)
• 1/2 yellow onion, chopped
• 5 cloves garlic, minced
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 can, 28 ounces, crushed tomatoes
  
• 2 ounces vodka (omit if you don't do alcohol, but then it's not vodka sauce anymore)
• 1 tablespoon dried oregano
• 1 teaspoon dried basil
• 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes
• salt and pepper to taste
• 1/2 cup heavy cream

Directions

1. In a pot (I used a 5 quart enameled Dutch oven), heat olive oil over medium high heat. 
2. When oil is heated, add peppers, onion, and garlic. Sautee for 5-8 minutes until the onions are translucent and the peppers still have just a bit of snap left in them. Take care not to let the garlic or anything else burn.
3. Add the tomatoes, vodka, oregano, basil, red pepper flakes, salt and pepper. Simmer for about 10 minutes.
4. Stir in heavy cream. Remove from heat and serve over pasta of your choice. 

Good times!

Red Sauce with Yellow Squash, Zucchini, and Pork

Bad news, we're still stuck at home. Good news, the garden is in! This means we need to start using up the veggies we put aside last season to make room for the glut (hopefully) of new produce! This recipe was really nothing more than a desperate attempt to use up two pounds of squash and zucchini. It actually was quite tasty and works really well with rotini pasta (yes, I know the picture shows linguine. We had it with rotini the next day). My only complaint was that we used sliced squash and zucchini that we had frozen. I wasn't a huge fan of the consistency, and in the future will chop them instead. The Wife said they were fine and I was just being nitpicky. That could be. I have some weird consistency issues with some food. That aside, it was easy to make and good. It also converts easily to vegetarian by simply leaving out the meat. This sauce could also be served over rice if you wanted a more goulash vibe.

Red Sauce with Yellow Squash, Zucchini,
 and Pork

Ingredients

• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 pound ground pork (ground beef or ground Italian sausage would work, too)
• 1 pound zucchini, chopped
• 1 pound yellow squash, chopped
• 1 medium onion, chopped
• 2 red bell peppers, cut into 1" strips
• 1 can (14.5 ounces) diced tomatoes, with liquid
• 1 can (8 ounces) tomato sauce
• 1 can (6 ounces) tomato paste
• 1 teaspoon dried oregano
• 1 teaspoon dried basil

Directions

1. In a large pan (I used a 5 quart Dutch oven), heat oil over medium heat. Add ground meat and brown (my meat did not yield much grease, so I didn't drain it. You may find you need to depending what you used).
2. Add zucchini, squash, onion, and peppers. Cook for about 7-10 minutes, stirring regularly to make sure the veggies cook evenly. (If you like the veggies with more snap, shorten the time. Lengthen the time if you want your veggies to be a bit mushier.)
3. Add the tomatoes, paste sauce, and seasoning. Stir to get the tomato paste evenly mixed. 
4. Bring to a simmer and let simmer for 10-15 minutes.

Meatball Sub Casserole

     Sometimes it's not about how a recipe looks. I know many of the food bloggers out there cringe at my photography. Most people know by now I don't find it that important. I want the food to taste good, not be photogenic. That leads me to this recipe I came up with. If you don't put sauce on the top, it looks like fake vomit. If you put the sauce on top, it looks like fake vomit with red sauce. I'd like it noted I took the high ground here and did not post a picture of fake vomit for comparison. Enough talk about vomit, let us talk of this fine casserole. I attempted to combine the flavors of a meatball sub into a casserole. I think I got pretty close. The combination of beef and red sauce come together well with the herbed stuffing mix. It's not spot on, but very reminiscent of a meatball sub. Granted, this hasn't really been a ringing endorsement. This is a tasty casserole and we wound up gladly eating all of it. As always, notes are in blue.

Meatball Sub Casserole

Ingredients

• 1-1/2 pounds ground beef (I used 80-20%)
• 1 6-ounce box herbed stuffing mix
• 1 can (10.75 ounce) tomato soup (use two cans if you want a more squishy casserole)
• 8 ounces shredded Mozzarella cheese
• 2 red bell peppers, sliced
• 1 medium onion, sliced
• 1 pint red sauce of your choice (I just whipped up a simple one with tomato sauce, garlic, basil and oregano. Use a jar or can of sauce if you're feeling lazy)

Directions

1. Combine ground beef, onions and peppers. Cook in a skillet until beef is browned. Drain grease (Unless you're a huge fan of lots of grease and a super soggy casserole, then by all means, leave it in)
2. In a large bowl, combine meat, onion and peppers with stuffing mix and the tomato soup. Mix thoroughly. Transfer to a 13"x9" baking dish coated with cooking spray. Spread it into an even layer. Pour red sauce over the top. 
3. Bake at 350F for 30 minutes. 

That's not fake vomit, that's Good Times!

UPDATE: Here's the video for this recipe!

Pork Chops in Mushroom Sauce

     One of my biggest complaints about slow-cooker recipes is they often end up tasting very similar. I've had chicken recipes that taste like beef recipes that taste like pork recipes. It doesn't matter what the ingredients are, the meals all end up with an inoffensive flat taste. That's why this particular recipe took us by surprise. While the recipe ends up uniformly beige, there's actually a definable flavor. I imagine that's due to the Dijon mustard. Regardless of the reason, this made for a very tasty meal. As always, any notes or changes are in blue.

Pork Chops in Mushroom Sauce
via Taste of Home Slow Cooker

Ingredients

• 1 can (10.75 ounce) condensed cream of mushroom soup, undiluted
• 1/4 cup chicken broth
• 1/4 cup country-style Dijon mustard (never in my life have I heard of "country-style" Dijon mustard. I'm calling bullshit and just using regular old Dijon)
• 1 garlic clove, minced (feeling lazy, just used 1 teaspoon minced from a jar)
• 1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon pepper
• 6 medium red potatoes, sliced (I used russet potatoes and everybody survived)
• 1 medium onion, halved and thinly sliced
• 6 boneless loin pork chops (5 ounces each) (I used 5. SO THERE)
• 8 ounces sliced mushrooms of your choice

Directions

1. In a 5 quart slow cooker, combine the soup, broth, mustard, garlic and seasonings. (I managed to stuff everything into a 2.5 quart slow cooker)
2. Stir in potatoes and onions; top with pork chops
3. Cover and cook on LOW for 3-1/2 to 4-1/2 hours or until meat is tender

"Sir, you are being chauffeured around in a $250,000 Rolls Royce. Buy your own damned mustard."
Good Times! 

Jalapeno Sauce via Hot Sauce!

     Our garden is producing peppers at such a rate that we have had to get creative in using them up. I can only freeze so many peppers. It was only a matter of time before I turned to a book the wife got me for Christmas. She knows I love hot sauces, so she figured she'd be irresponsible and give me a manual on how to make them at home. That manual, Hot Sauce!, is indispensable to someone starting out making hot sauces. Up to this point, I have only ever really made a couple pepper pastes, fondly called Master Ridley, Latimer (bonus points if you understand why I used these names), and a concoction known as Shrieking Anus Paste. It was time to branch out. My first attempt at a new recipe would be the Jalapeno Sauce from the book. It made sense since the garden is dropping a dozen large jalapenos a day. So how is this sauce? It has a very bright flavor, almost like salsa verde, but with a fierce punch of heat right up front. The flavor and heat play well together.

This is a fairly accurate depiction of my wife trying out the sauce.

     In the end, the overall flavor of the sauce is more than worth the initial burn. I popped a can of this when a friend came over for dinner. He and my wife ate over half a pint of this stuff, just scooping it up with nachos. The thickness of the sauce will vary from batch to batch, depending on the size of the peppers you use. The larger the peppers, the more this will lean toward a very thin salsa. Smaller peppers and it becomes more of a straight sauce. As always, any changes or notes will be in blue.

Jalapeno Sauce
via Hot Sauce! by Jennifer Trainer Thompson

Ingredients

• 12 fresh jalapeno chiles, stemmed and cut into chunks (use bigger peppers if you want a thicker sauce)
• 1 medium yellow onion, peeled
• 2 cups distilled white vinegar
• 1 cup water
• 2 garlic cloves, peeled
• Juice of 1 lime
• Pinch of salt
• 1/2 cup fresh cilantro leaves (we worried the cilantro would overpower the sauce, so we went with a little over 1/4 cup)

Directions

1. Combine all of the ingredients in a blender and puree.

   

   Fire in the hole!

2. Transfer the puree to a nonreactive saucepan (if you're not familiar with the term, enameled or stainless steel pans are nonreactive. What happens if you use a reactive pan?) 

   

   It's probably better if you don't use a reactive pan.

   Bring to a boil, then lower the heat and simmer for 10 minutes.
3. Let cool, then pour into bottles. You can eat it right away or place in sealed bottles for future use (we packed ours in half pint jars and processed in a boiling water bath for about 15 minutes. Again, read up on canning if you haven't done it before. I will continue to state that I'm not responsible when you inevitably poison yourself.)

Good times!

Meatballs and Red Sauce

     There are some recipes that only get cooked a few times a year. There are many reasons for this. Sometimes the recipe calls for expensive or hard to find items. Sometimes the recipe is difficult or time consuming. Sometimes it's something you only cook for special occasions. In this particular case, it's a matter of being time consuming. If you want to do this particular recipe right, you need to be willing to take the time.  You're going to get your hands dirty. You're going to make a mess.
     So why do I even cook this particular recipe at all? Well, it's delicious. The second I saw this recipe, I knew it was going to be good. I've gotten some duds out of Bon Appetit before, but this would not be one of them. The main reason I cook this dish? The wife loves it. Raves about it. This is one of her favorite things for me to cook. That's enough reason for me.

Meatballs with Red Sauce
(via Bon Appetit)

Ingredients 

Sauce

• 2 28-ounce cans whole peeled tomatoes in juice, drained, juice reserved, tomatoes finely chopped 
• ½ cup (1 stick) butter 
• 2 medium onions, peeled, halved 
• ½ teaspoon salt 

Meatballs

• 1 cup fresh breadcrumbs made from crustless French or country style bread 
• 1/3 cup milk
• 8 ounces ground beef (85/15%) 
• 8 ounces ground pork 
• 1 cup finely ground (not grated) Parmesan cheese 
• 1/3 cup finely chopped Italian parsley 
• 1 teaspoon salt 
• ¼ teaspoon ground black pepper 
• 2 large eggs 
• 2 large garlic cloves, pressed 

Freshly grated Parmesan cheese for serving

Directions

Sauce

1. Combine tomatoes with juice, butter, onions, and salt in large wide pot. Bring to simmer over medium heat. Reduce heat; simmer uncovered 45 minutes 
2. Use immersion blender to break up large pieces. Sauce should not be completely smooth. Season with salt and pepper, remove from heat 

Meatballs

1. Combine breadcrumbs and milk in small bowl; stir until breadcrumbs are evenly moistened, let stand for 10 minutes. 
2. Place beef and pork in large bowl and break up into small chunks. Add 1 cup ground Parmesan, parsley, salt and pepper 
3. Whisk eggs in small bowl; whisk in garlic. Add to meat. 
4. Using hands, squeeze all milk from breadcrumbs. Add them to meat mixture. LIGHTLY mix until all ingredients are combined. DO NOT OVERMIX!!! Chill at least 15 minutes and up to 1 hour. 
5. Moisten hands with reserved milk. Roll meat mixture GENTLY between palms into golf-ball sized balls. AVOID COMPACTING THE MEATBALLS! 
6. Place single layer in sauce pot. Bring to simmer, reduce heat to medium-low, cover and simmer until meatballs are thoroughly cooked through, about 15-20 minutes 
7. Cool slightly, chill uncovered until cold, cover and keep chilled. Rewarm before serving.

Good times!