T-Bird Hot Sauce

     Every year I plant way too many hot peppers and every year I find myself desperate to find ways to use them up. I have bags and bags of peppers that I've dried, but those really start to take up space. I am always looking for new and exciting ways to use up lots of peppers in one go. This particular sauce certainly fits the bill, using five dozen peppers. It also uses up some tamarind concentrate that I mistakenly bought when I was shopping for tahini. For whatever reason, I'm always mixing tahini and tamarind up, which generally doesn't end well in a recipe. Though very spicy, this sauce has a wonderful deep and mellow flavor underneath from the tamarind and guajilo. This is a go-to sauce for chicken or pork dishes. It's thick enough to hold up on the barbecue or hot wings. As for the name? I used Thai peppers in the recipe. I know "bird" specifically refers to the dried pepper, but the name was too good to pass up. "T" for Thai or Tamarind and "Bird" for the alternate pepper name. I am so damned clever it hurts. As always, notes are in blue.

Ingredients

• 1 tablespoon tomato paste
• 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
• 1 Tablespoon tamarind concentrate
• 1 cup cider vinegar
• 1/3 cup water
• 60 Thai bird chili peppers, stemmed (cayenne or serrano can be substituted, but you may need to use less, as those peppers are generally larger)
• 1 dried Ancho chili
• 2 dried Guajillo chilis
• 4 tomatoes, chopped
• 1 onion, chopped
• 1 carrot, chopped
• 1 rib celery, chopped

Directions

1. Add all ingredients to a food processor (make sure it is a large capacity processor, at least 7 cups. 10 would be better, unless you're a fan of leaking and caustic messes. Caustic Mess would be an outstanding punk band name). Process until smooth.
2. Transfer mixture to a nonreactive pot and bring to a boil. Reduce to a simmer and let simmer for about 10 minutes. (If you're not planning on canning this sauce for storage, you're done. If you want to store this sauce long term, go on to the next steps)
3. Prepare a boiling water canner and submerge 4 half pint jars (or two full pint jars) to sterilize in the boiling water. (You can be doing this while the sauce is simmering)
4. Remove the jars and fill with the warm sauce. Leave 1/4" headspace in each jar.
5. Seal the jars with a 2 piece lid and process in the boiling water bath for 12 minutes (If you're doing full pints, go for about 16 minutes).
6. After 12 minutes, remove from the bath and set on a wire rack to cool. Eventually, you'll hear the satisfying "pop" that tells you the jar has sealed. If after a few hours, a jar hasn't sealed, put on a new lid and try reboiling for another 12 minutes. If it doesn't seal after that, just give up and use the sauce. It will hold for a long time in the fridge. Properly processed and sealed, the sauce is good for at least a year. As always, double check everything with the National Center for Home Food Preservation to ensure you don't poison anybody.

Good Times!

Too Damned Easy Pickled Cabbage

     Ah, the humble cabbage. Really, there's not a whole lot I can say other than to head into a bunch of cabbage fart jokes. That's too obvious, so we'll get to it. Fermentation is all the rage right now and everybody is fermenting all sorts of things. Unfortunately, I don't follow current trends (as anybody who has seen my wardrobe or listened to my music can attest). I am also lazy and impatient. Fermenting takes time. If I want sauerkraut, I would have to put in the time. That's not happening. Instead, I made this pickled mixture. It's got a nice tang, some big flavor and a bit of a snap. There's room for interpretation, too. This stuff makes a great side dish, or cut up some smoked sausage and mix it in for a gastric bludgeon! By no means do you actually have to boil can this stuff. If you plan on eating it right away, skip steps 4 and 5 and serve it up. I think the extra time gives it some extra flavor. Plus, I like looking at the cans. As always, notes are in blue.

Too Damned Easy
Pickled Cabbage

Ingredients

• 2 medium heads cabbage, cut into 1/2-inch wide ribbons
• 6 banana peppers, sliced into 1/2-inch wide rings (if you want to add a bit of spice, use Hungarian Wax peppers instead)
• 1 medium white onion, quartered and sliced
• 12 peppercorns
• 1 tablespoon fennel seeds
• 1 teaspoon red pepper flakes
• 2 cups cider vinegar (make sure it has 5% acidity)
• 2 cups water

Directions

1. Toss cabbage, peppers and onion in a large bowl. Make sure everything is evenly distributed.
2. In a large, non-reactive pot, combine vinegar, water, peppercorns, red pepper flakes and fennel seeds. Heat to a boil.

   

   We've discussed the issue with non-reactive pots. 

3. Add the vegetables and stir for 3-5 minutes (you want everything mixed in the vinegar. You don't want to overcook the veggies though. They should still have some snap when you can them).
4. With a slotted spoon, load vegetables into quart jars. Top with the hot liquid, leaving 1/4 inch head space (make sure to load the peppercorns, pepper flakes and fennel seeds in there, too. Nothing is wasted here).
5. Seal jars with a canning lid and ring and process in a boiling water bath for 15 minutes. As always, refer to the National Center for Home Food Preservation to see how to not accidentally kill anyone. Properly sealed jars should be good for around a year (don't quote me on that. If you make yourself sick, we never met). 

Good times!

Fruit Punch Hot Sauce

     Some time ago I held a little contest to determine the name of a hot sauce I had created. I picked a winner and then subsequently forgot all about it. I even managed to misplace the recipe. Having finally located the recipe, I am finally posting it! This is a cayenne sauce with a strong citrus base. It's excellent on seafood and chicken. I haven't tried it on anything else, but fully intend to. As far as heat, on a scale of 1 being no real heat to 10 being "Oh God, eventually this has to come out my anus," I'd give this a 4-5. As always, any notes are in blue.

Fruit Punch Hot Sauce

Ingredients

• 5 ounces cayenne peppers, seeded and roughly chopped
• 10 ounces red banana peppers, seeded and roughly chopped (not sure where you're going to find these; these peppers were mutants out of our garden)
• juice of 2 lemons
• 1/4 cup orange juice
• 1 medium tomato, roughly chopped
• 2 cloves garlic
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 2 cups cider vinegar

Directions

1. Throw everything into a blender and blend the living shit out of it.
2. Pour the blended mixture into a non-reactive saucepan and bring to a boil; boil for 2 minutes.
3. Strain mixture into bottles/cans (This will make a little over a pint of sauce)
4. If you are intending to store long term, process canning jars in a boiling water bath for 12 minutes for 1/2-pints and 15 minutes for pints (as always, please refer to the National Center for Home Food Preservation for detailed instructions and tips for giving everyone dysentery) 

Good times!

Hot Mango Flush Hot Sauce

     I've been on quite a hot sauce kick this summer. Mostly this is due to the fact that making hot sauce is the most efficient way to use up lots of garden produce in one shot. This time I decided I was going to make my own hot sauce from scratch. I know that mango is a solid accompaniment to most hot peppers, so I used jalapenos and mangoes as the base. From there I just sort of went bat-shit crazy and started adding stuff. What I ended up with elicited tremendous positive response from the The Wife and our friend Dan. This sauce starts with a straight shot of jalapeno then opens up into a finish of fruit and a bite from the rum. We put the naming rights up for a vote on my Facebook page and the hands down winner came from The Wife. She knows that my favorite band is Jethro Tull. Most of the band members are huge pepper heads and really enjoy spicy foods. They make mention of hot foods more than once in their music. She suggested naming the sauce after one of their songs: "Hot Mango Flush." I know a winner when I hear one!
As always, any notes are in blue.

Hot Mango Flush

Ingredients

• 1 ripe mango, peeled, pitted and cubed
• 12 jalapenos stemmed and seeded (or leave the seeds in if you want more heat)
• 1 medium onion, roughly chopped
• 1 cup cider vinegar
• 1/4 cup fresh squeezed lime juice
• 1/4 cup gold rum
• 1 teaspoon Ukrainian Village Seasoning from The Spice House (this seasoning is a blend of salt, garlic, onion, pepper, green onion, and red and green peppers)

Directions

1. Combine all ingredients in a large, non-reactive pan. Bring to a boil, then lower to a simmer. Simmer for about 10-12 minutes or until all the vegetables are soft. 
2. Load everything into a blender and pulse until smooth.

   

   Looks like a sneeze gone wrong. I assure you it does not taste that way.

3. If you are using right away, just put in a container and refrigerate. If you plan on long term storage, this will yield a little over one pint of sauce. Load into two half pint jars and process in a boiling water bath for 15 minutes (As always, if you're not familiar with canning, refer to the National Center for Home Food Preparation to learn how not to accidentally poison your entire family)

Good Times!

                                  

BBQ Jalapeno Peppers and Onions

     Every year, the garden produces jalapeno and banana peppers faster than I can use them. Desperate times called for desperate measures. I turned to Allrecipes.  After digging around, I found one of my favorite recipes for working through surplus peppers. I've tweaked the recipe to add in more of my produce. This recipe makes a LOT of extra sauce, so don't be shy about loading in extra peppers and onions. Even if you do have extra sauce, it's vinegar based, so it will can well.

     I'm not joking when I tell you that this sauce is the bomb-diggety. True story, I gave a pint to a co-worker because he liked it so much. Somehow, it fell out of his mailbox in the workroom and shattered. He came to me literally on the verge of tears. I brought him a quart the next day. He cradled it in his arms and smiled tenderly at it. I'm fairly sure he showed more affection for that quart of sauce than his own kids. Either way, this sauce is beyond good and will bring any meat to another level entirely. As always, notes and changes are in blue.

BBQ Peppers and Onions
via Allrecipes

Ingredients

• 2 cups corn oil 
• 2 cups cider vinegar 
• 2 cups white sugar 
• 4 cups ketchup 
• 1 pound fresh jalapeno peppers, sliced into rings 
• 1 pinch dried oregano (in this case, a pinch is a teaspoon)
• 1 clove garlic, minced 
• 1 pound fresh Banana Peppers, sliced into rings
• At least 1 large Yellow Onion, sliced

Directions

1. In a large pot, stir together the corn oil, cider vinegar, sugar, and ketchup until sugar has dissolved completely. 
2. Bring to a boil, then add the jalapeno peppers (any other peppers and onion go in at this step, too). Reduce heat to low, and simmer for 10 minutes. Season with oregano and garlic. 
3. Ladle into sterile pint jars, leaving 1/4 inch of space at the top. Wipe rims with a clean dry towel. Seal with lids and rings. Process in a hot water bath for 10 minutes to seal (I can't say I agree with the time of the water bath here, especially not for a full pint. As a rule of thumb, I do 12 minutes for a half pint, 15 for a full pint. I've done it my way for three years and haven't killed anybody yet)
4. Refrigerate any unsealed jars.

Good times!