'Nero Fiddles Hot Sauce

 We are about halfway through September and the garden is still throwing habanero peppers like it's mad at us. The Wife is making noises about giving some of them away, and that just won't do. So I decided to make a hot sauce recipe that uses two dozen peppers a batch. I did. This one is a real roller coaster ride. It's like a Saturday morning with a six-year old in the house. It starts off nice and pleasant and then all of a sudden all hell breaks loose. That's the best way I can describe it. More specifically, it's got a bright, slightly fruity taste. I have no idea what I'm going to do with it. I could probably make some absolutely deadly hot-wings. Possibly add a few drops to a Bloody Mary. Maybe just drink it straight if I wanted to scream for a while. Basically a lovely flavor plays around in your mouth as you burn.

This recipe will yield 1-1/2 pints of sauce. If you own a Insta-Pot Ace blender, you can actually do everything but the canning step in the blender by running the puree program. 

Give it a spin and tell me what you think, as long as it's positive. As always, notes are in blue.

'Nero Fiddles Hot Sauce

Ingredients

• 2 dozen habanero peppers, stems removed (don't you even think about removing the seeds, you big baby)
• 2 red bell peppers, chopped
• 1 white onion, chopped
• 2 teaspoons chopped fresh sage
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 cup white vinegar
• 1/4 cup lime juice
• 1/4 cup white tequila (if you don't do alcohol, just omit and split the difference between more vinegar and lime juice)

Directions

1. Put all the ingredients in a blender. Blend until smooth.
2. Pour contents of blender into a non-reactive pot. Heat to a simmer for about 10 minutes. 
3. Return to the blender (or use an immersion blender) to ensure everything is totally liquefied. 
4. If you're not going to can this sauce, you're done. 

   

   Fire in the hole!

5. If you are canning, fill three half pint jars to 1/4 inch headspace and secure lid and ring. Process in a boiling water bath for about 12-15 minutes. As always, review canning procedures at The National Center for Home Food Preservation to make sure you don't accidentally poison anyone. 

Good times!

RC-Tequila Carnitas

     I am a Goddamn genius. I'm just putting it out there right now. This recipe is proof of my towering intellect.  I have created a meal of such unsurpassed deliciousness that even the most accomplished chef would bow before it. I can say without fear of contradiction that this is one of the greatest things I have ever cooked. All bombast aside, this is truly a fantastic dish. It's also super easy to make, though it does take a while. I have always enjoyed the carnitas I would get at Mexican restaurants and wanted to make them at home. Granted, I don't think RC and bottom shelf tequila qualify as authentic Mexican, but such is life. It's good. So good. Change your pants good. Just make it. Then shower me with the praise I no doubt deserve.

RC-Tequila Carnitas

Ingredients

• 2 pound pork shoulder (Boston Butt)
• 1 sweet onion, cut in half and thinly sliced
• 2 cans cola (we used RC)
• 1/3 cup tequila (I imagine the tequila you use will slightly effect the flavor. We used Sauza white tequila)
• 2 tablespoons vegetable oil
• Salt, pepper, red pepper flakes, fennel seeds

Directions

1. Rub meat (*snicker*) with salt, pepper, red pepper and fennel. Set aside.
2. In a large enameled cast iron dutch oven, heat 2 tablespoons oil at medium-high heat. Add onion and cook for 5-7 minutes, stirring occasionally, until onions are golden brown. 
3. Turn up heat a bit and add roast, searing on each side for a couple minutes or until it starts to brown.
4. Add the cola and tequila. Liquid should be deep enough that at least half the meat is submerged. Bring to a boil, then reduce to a simmer. 
5. Cover and put in oven preheated to 350F (180C, Gasmark 4) and cook for 3 hours. Check level of liquid, adding more if necessary to keep the roast about halfway in the liquid.
6. Reduce heat to 250F (130C, Gasmark 1/2) and cook another hour. 
7. Remove meat from dutch oven and use two forks to pull the meat into chunks (don't fully shred the meat. You want some nice quarter-sized chunks of meat)
8. Spread the meat on a baking sheet or in a Pyrex dish. Put under the broiler for 5-10 minutes or until the meat starts to crisp a bit on the edges.
9. Take any remaining liquid and onion from the dutch oven and stir it in with the meat. 

Better than the usual Good Times!

Slow Cooker Margarita Chicken and Black Beans

     I'm pretty sure there's about 150,000 different slow-cooker Mexican style chicken recipes floating around the interwebz, so I figured why not add another? This particular recipe assembles quickly and makes for a fairly versatile meal. We served it over rice, in tortillas and as a nacho topping. Just make sure to drain off any excess liquid if you're using it in tortillas, tacos or nachos, otherwise everything will get soggy. This is very mild. I wound up adding habanero hot sauce to mine, but I really like the heat. As always, any notes are in blue.

Slow Cooker Margarita Chicken
and Black Beans

Ingredients

• 1 pound boneless, skinless chicken
• 1 can (15 ounces) black beans, rinsed and drained
• 1 can stewed tomatoes, with liquid
• 1/2 onion, chopped
• 1/2 bell pepper, chopped (any color is fine; we used red)
• 1 tablespoon pepper in adobo sauce (you can find these canned in the ethnic section of most grocery stores)
• 2 ounces tequila (optional if booze isn't your thing)
• 1 tablespoon lime juice (I used the stuff from the little plastic lime. I love that sort of thing)
• 1 teaspoon Pilsen Latino Seasoning (from The Spice House)
• for those who don't have access to the above seasoning, it includes: coarse Kosher flake salt, garlic & onion powders, Mexican oregano, Tellicherry black pepper, hot red pepper flakes.

Directions

1. Place chicken in bottom of slow cooker.
2. Unceremoniously dump all other ingredients on top of chicken.
3. Give a quick stir. Cook on LOW 6-8 hours.
4. Remove chicken from cooker, shred and return to cooker. 

UPDATE: Now there's a YouTube video for this recipe!

Middle Class Bartending: Days 4 & 5

     We are now heading into the second half of Hanukkah. It is also 12/12/12, and the Mayan Apocalypse is just around the corner. What does that mean? No clue. However, we will ponder it all with two new beverages.  The first is based on a Jewish holiday tradition. That tradition is based on where we traditionally eat on Christmas.

Jewish Christmas

Ingredients

• 1ounce Maotai Liquor
• 12 ounces Tsingtao

Directions

1. Pour Maotai into shot glass
2. Drop into mug of Tsingtao
3. Drink as a Boilermaker

     This one just struck me as a fun drink to put together. You can never go wrong this time of the year with a Fiddler on the Roof reference.

Tequila Sunrise, Sunset

 Ingredients

• 2 ounces tequila
• 2 ounces orange juice
• 2 ounces blue curacao
• 1 ounce grenadine

Directions

1. Pour tequila, orange juice, and blue curacao in that order over ice. Do not stir.
2. Pour grenadine around edge of cocktail (inside edge, don't be a dummy).
3. Garnish with orange slice

It happens every time.
Two drinks and BAM! I'm up on the  damned roof!

Good times!