Mexican Style Lasagna

I can't believe that we're still cooking meals this far into the stay at home order. I figure at some point we would have devolved into an endless parade of frozen pizzas, ramen, and mac & cheese. And yet here we are! We're even modifying book recipes! Go us! This particular recipe originally called for lasagna noodles, which we thought was dumb. Also, we didn't have enough lasagna noodles and I didn't feel like making them from scratch. We swapped in and out a bunch of ingredients. If you don't have sofrito laying about, or can't make it from scratch, just use a pack of taco seasoning or some chili powder. Go wild. It's all gonna be poop in the end. I was surprised at how much I enjoyed this. It had a lot of flavor and was very filling. It's currently sitting in my stomach like a brick. Mocking me. TWAS HUBRIS THAT BROUGHT ME HERE. Sorry, I'll go.

Mexican Style Lasagna

Ingredients

• 1 pound ground beef
• 1 16oz. can refried beans
• 1/4 cup sofrito
• 1 tablespoon dried, minced onion
• 1 teaspoon ground cumin
• 1 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1 teaspoon oregano
• 12 corn tortillas (6" diameter)
• 1 16oz. jar of your favorite salsa
• 16 ounces sour cream
• 3 ounces (about half a can) of black olives, sliced
• 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350F (177C, Gasmark 4)
2. In a skillet, brown ground beef. 
3. Drain the beef and add the minced onion, cumin, garlic powder, oregano, and sofrito. Cook another 3-4 minutes.
4. Add the refried beans to the meat and mix until completely incorporated.
5. Grease a 9"x13" baking dish. Add a layer of 6 corn tortillas. (We discovered if you cut the tortillas in half, you can put the flat edges against the edges of the pan and make a uniform layer.)
6. Take half the meat mixture and spread it evenly over the layer of tortillas
7. Add another layer of tortillas and top it with the rest of the meat mixture.
8. Top with the salsa and cook at 350F for 35 minutes.
9. Take out of oven and add a layer of sour cream. Then top with cheese and olives.

Good Times!

Spicy Vinegar Braised Riblets

As we have been sheltering at home for some weeks now, we have started to run out of really good meat. We still have what we call "garbage chicken" and a couple odds and ends. We decided to support our local businesses and put in an order to a seed and beef service in the area. We gave them a budget and told them to just give us an assortment of beef and pork. Once of the pork products we got was riblets. Very little fat, little ribs. They were adorable. I found a recipe to braise them, and then immediately ignored most of the recipe and happily went off in my own direction. The result was ribs with meat that was tender and falling off the bone. Flavor? HELLS YES. They were tangy from the vinegar with a nice bit of heat from the peppers and Cajun seasoning. This recipe is stupid easy and just about fool-proof. Enjoy!

Spicy Vinegar Braised Riblets

Ingredients

• 2 lbs pork riblets (you could probably use any pork ribs you want, we just liked the idea of little ribs!)
• Cajun seasoning
• 1 cup hot pepper infused vinegar (if you don't have this you can get by with a cup of white vinegar and a couple chopped jalapenos or a teaspoon or so of cayenne)
• 1 can (8 ounces) tomato sauce
• 1 tablespoon dried, minced onions

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 300F (150C, Gasmark 2)
2. Liberally sprinkle Cajun seasoning over both sides of riblets. 
3. Cut riblets into individual pieces and put in Dutch oven.
4. In a bowl, mix the vinegar, tomato sauce, and onions
5. Pour contents of bowl over riblets
6. Cover Dutch oven and put in oven for 75 minutes or until meat starts to fall off the bone

Good times!

Homebound Day #35: The Other Shoe Falls.

Well, it's been a couple of weeks since my last blog post on the stay at home order and much has happened. For one, our governor has declared school buildings will not reopen for the remainder of this school year; all classes will continue online. So that means it's a good thing I cleared the yogurts out of my classroom fridge before I left.
The other big thing was that my car died. With The Wife and Spud in it, and the dogs, and $100+ in groceries, and the curbside order from Chili's we picked up. Stone dead. Friday evening. Had to get the mother-in-law to come pick us up. I had a spectacular meltdown. Had the car towed to the dealership. Good news, the battery just died. Like forever dead. I also found out I needed front brakes and a tune up (this was not a surprise, the car has like 115,000 miles on it.) Fortunately, it's not like I need the car for anything.
I also discovered that white flour is Nigh Impossible to purchase. Stores that do have flour are selling it in one pound zip bags, like cocaine. The other choice is the convenient 25 pound restaurant/hotel bag.

But at $15.99, I can't complain.
Time to bake 6,000 cookies.

Amazingly that curbside pickup from Chili's was the first meal during this ordeal that was not cooked at home. (They also screwed up my order and gave me fries instead of the onion petals I paid an upcharge for. Granted, the world is coming apart at the seams, so I'll let it go.) I've been cooking a lot, even more than normal. We even ordered a box of meats from a local farm to support the locals and ensure we have good things to eat. 

As far as booze, we've worked through about a third of our supply of wine (originally 48 bottles), and we're close to running out of tequila and gin. We will soon find out how a tequila sunrise is with vodka.

The Spud is taking it all in stride, especially now that the weather will permit her to hang out in the yard. She does comment that she misses school and her friends, and we worry what will happen if her 5th (!) birthday is socially distanced. Honestly, if the cake is big enough, she will be fine.

Hope everyone is doing well and staying safe!

My Other Hobby: Tabletop Gaming #2: Cooperative Games

Cooperative is a very neat genre of tabletop games. In a cooperative game, the players are all working together against the game itself. This is nice because competitive games can get ugly, especially if there is player elimination. You know what I'm talking about. You get smoked early in Monopoly, then sit there like a schmuck as a couple players sit there for 3 hours trying to wear each other down. It sucks, and can easily end in a flipped over table or a punched player. Cooperative games still carry that risk, because you are can lose to the game or to your fellow players' stupidity! FUN!

To be honest, cooperative games are a lot of fun and there is a great sense of accomplishment at beating one. What you do need to avoid in some of co-op games is the phenomenon of the "Alpha Player." This is a player (usually the most familiar with the game) who tries to direct every other player on what they should do for their turn. In the event this happens, you need only tell them "shut the fuck up and let me take my turn."

Here are three of our favorite co-op games:

Hanabi

Number of players: 2-5
Time to play: 25 minutes
How do you win?: Arrange stacks of cards by color and number
Difficulty to learn/teach: Easy

Hanabi is a very accessible card game and is great fun. Every player starts with a hand of cards (cards come in five colors and are numbered 1-5). The object is to create five stacks of cards, one color for each stack, each stack in order from #1-5.
Simple!
Except everybody holds their hands with their cards facing AWAY from themselves. You can see every other players' cards EXCEPT your own. Each turn you can do one of three things:

1. Lay down a card. If the card will go on one of the stacks, excellent. If not, that's a strike. Three strikes and everybody loses.
2. Give another player a hint. This costs a token. The group has a finite amount of tokens to use. You can then tell another player how many of a color OR number they have, but not both. You are allowed to point to the cards.
3. Discard a card to regain a token.

That's it. The game is deceptively difficult but a lot of fun. You're not allowed to give any sort of clue that a player is about to play/discard something they shouldn't. You have to sit there stonefaced as they either succeed to fail. Great game and fairly inexpensive.

Pandemic

Number of players: 2-4

Time to play: 45 minutes
How do you win?: Find cures for four different diseases
Difficulty to learn/teach: Medium

Pandemic is one of the most well known cooperative games and generally the game against which other cooperative games are measured. It is also extremely topical right now. Four different diseases have broken out at once, and the players are a group of scientists/professionals who are charged with controlling the outbreak and finding cures before the diseases overtake the board or time runs out. Each turn a player can take several actions such as moving, building facilities, controlling outbreaks, or curing the diseases. The game is extremely tense and it is very possible to lose the game quickly. Each player takes a specific role with special abilities no other player will have. There are several expansions to this game which you certainly do not need right away. There is also a Legacy version of this game. Probably avoid this version first. The Legacy game has a finite amount of plays and the game gets permanently altered as you play. This is arguably a must own game for any collection.

Space Alert

Number of players: 1-5
Time to play: 30 minutes
How do you win?: Survive for 10 minutes as everything goes to shit
Difficulty to learn/teach: medium/difficult (the game includes a great system that slowly eases you into the game, adding new mechanics each play)

This game has a fairly steep learning curve, but is totally worth the effort. The players are the crew of a survey ship. The ship simply has to sit for 10 minutes. However, during that 10 minutes, literally everything that ever went wrong in Star Trek occurs during that 10 minutes. IN REAL TIME. There is a CD (also an App) that will play announcements from the ship. The crew must then respond to those threats by playing cards to move their crew members around, charging shields/weapons, firing weapons, etc. All as the ship relentlessly gives more and more alerts of things going wrong. These things can be meteor swarms, attacking ships, boarding parties, aliens, etc.

At the end of 10 minutes. You basically rewind time and then go turn by turn and see if your planning actually worked. Generally it does not. You end up with people fighting for the elevator, trying to fire weapons that haven't been charged, or standing there helplessly as large portions of the ship are exposed to the screaming void of space.

The game has been best described as "imagine putting five people into a giant hamster ball. Give them all meth, then have them try to navigate a Super G downhill ski course." There will be an amusing amount of screaming, then everyone dies. Repeatedly.  That being said, the game is extremely good and a great game if you can get four other willing people.

Next time we'll take a look at games for two players!

The World Needs Another Cheese Dip Recipe

As the world slowly descends into utter madness, I realize what we need now, more than ever, is another Rotel-style cheese dip. There's a pretty good chance I've managed to create something that already exists, which begs the existential question:

If I created something that has already been created, but I had never known about it, was it still an original creation?

Honestly, who the fuck cares. It's really good dip and that's all that matters.

Objectively Original Cheese Dip

Ingredients

• 1 pound cooked and shredded/crumbled meat of your choice (Seriously, almost any meat will work. We used pork loin. Chicken, ground beef, ground turkey, fake crab, shrimp, go nuts. Maybe not like salmon or clams, but the sky's the limit. Or leave out the meat if it's not your thing)
• 1-10.5 ounce can cheddar cheese soup
• 1 -10 ounce can diced tomatoes with jalapenos, drained 
• 4 ounces cream cheese
• 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

Directions

1. Throw everything in a slow cooker and cook on LOW for 2-3 hours, stirring occasionally
   OR
   Put everything in a deep saucepan and cook on medium heat, stirring regularly, for about 7-10 minutes, until the cream cheese and cheddar are incorporated. Don't let it simmer or it's going to scorch in the pan.
2. There is no step #2

Good times!

My Other Hobby: Table Top Gaming. Gateway Games

As many of you know, my other hobby is table top gaming. Board, card, miniatures, you name it. I love games. And as we are stuck at home for an extended period of time, gaming is a great way to pass the time. Every now and then I'll put up a post suggesting games for certain situations. Today, I have three suggestion for those who may be new to the hobby, or don't want anything to deep. I've tried to keep the price point reasonable, between $25-35. Most of these games can be found on Amazon or Walmart, but do consider helping out your Friendly Local Game Store (FLGS), and ordering from them instead. Brick and mortar game stores are taking a huge beating during the shutdown. Many are more than happy to ship directly to you. If needed, contact me and I will be happy to suggest some great FLGS's to contact.

Gateway Games

Tsuro

Number of players: 2-8
Time to play: 15 minutes
How do you win?: Last man standing
Difficulty to learn/teach: Easy

Tsuro is as simple as it gets. Every turn you'll choose one of three tiles and lay it in front of your piece, then follow the path you have created until you reach the end of the path. If the path takes you to an empty space, your turn ends. If the path sends you off the board, you lose. If the path sends you into another player, you both lose. HOWEVER, you can never intentionally send yourself off the board or into another player unless you have no other options. Last person on the board wins. It is also possible for everyone to lose or in rare cases, have a tie. This is a super easy game to learn with a fair bit of strategy. The theme is simple and accessible.
Problem: The game is currently unavailable on Amazon, so you may have to look around. The other option is to get Tsuro of the Seas, which has the base mechanics of the original, but adds a couple new things.

Carcassonne

Number of Players: 2-5
Time to Play: 45 minutes
How do you win?: Most points
Difficulty to learn/teach: simple/moderate

Carcassonne is a tile-laying strategy game. Each turn you will draw a tile from a bag and lay it in a way that it matches up with another tile. You will create roads, cities, farms, and abbeys along these tiles to score points. Points are scored by playing "meeples" (your pieces) on these features. You have a limited amount of meeples to use during the game, so you must carefully consider your strategy. Most points wins the game. This is a nice game because there is not much direct competition. You can certainly try to lay tiles to mess up someone's strategy, or claim features before another player, but nothing that makes you want to choke a bitch out.

King of Tokyo

Number of Players: 2-6 (best with 3 or more)
Time to Play: 30 minutes
How do you win?: Last man standing
Difficulty to learn/teach: simple/moderate

King of Tokyo is best described as Combat Yahtzee. Each player takes the role of a giant monster attempting to take over Tokyo. Each turn you will roll dice, Yahtzee style, to attack, heal, or gain energy. Energy is used to buy cards to add powers to your monster. The combat is high risk, as only one monster can stand in Tokyo city. If that monster attacks, he damages ALL players outside the city. Conversely, all players outside the city can only attack the monster IN the city. This game is absolutely about direct competition, and trash talk and wild gesticulating is encouraged. Highly thematic and lots of fun for all ages.

Next time, we'll look at cooperative games, where you're all on the same team, playing against the game itself!

Homebound Day #20: Red Sauce

Holy moly. We are heading into our 4th week of sheltering in place. I finally had to risk it and run out for milk for the Spud. I figured I'd pick up a few essentials, as well, since I'd be out. We didn't have any masks available, so I had to improvise.

And I figured maybe I could rob a train on the way home. 

I decided to stay close to home and hit the Dollar General in town. Milk was $3.69 a gallon, which was horrifying. Milk, creamer, cheese, orange juice and a few other staples set me back nearly $75. Granted, the store was mercifully devoid of people and within a mile of my house. With my adventure out of the way, I whipped up a batch of red sauce, and added some meatballs, rib bones, and Italian sausages. We served it up over some ravioli with some home made giardiniera. 

Just like you'd get at Olive Garden, but good!

Whenever we make this sauce, we have plenty of leftovers, which is intentional. The Spud loves the meatballs and the sauce is versatile. The next day we had The Wife's Eggplant Parmesan with the sauce. Today we took the leftover Italian sausage and made grinders with pepper jack cheese and giardiniera. 

Just like Portillo's, but totally not!

During this time, we worked through the last of the turkey pasta we made with our "Thanksgiving" leftovers. We also have been enjoying a tray of chocolate chip peanut butter bars for our treats. I was saddened to see that I'm working through my supply of bottom shelf bourbon faster than I'd like. I will have to console myself with vodka, gin, scotch, and rum. 

I don't know when this will all be done. As I've mentioned before, I think the school year is done for. It will likely be online learning for the rest of the year. I am at least encouraged by the fact that we were able to go nearly four weeks without needing to go to the store, and were it not for milk, we'd probably last another 2-3 weeks. 

Stay Safe!

Too Damned Easy Turkey Pot Pie

Remember when you were a kid, and you wanted a pot pie? And your mom would have to preheat the oven? Then you'd have to wait like another 45 minutes for the pot pie to cook? Then you'd be so hungry that when it finally came out of the oven, you wouldn't wait and you'd take a bite and burn the living shit out of the roof of your mouth? Good times. This recipe won't take quite as long, but can still blister the hell out of the roof of your mouth if you don't wait. We cannibalized a different recipe to make this. In retrospect, the pie to biscuit ratio seems off. There is way more biscuit than filling. I'd recommend at least adding some more gravy and possibly increasing the amount of the fillings. The flavor is fine, it's just a bit biscuity. As always, notes are in blue.

Too Damned Easy Turkey Pot Pie

Ingredients

• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 1 stalk celery, finely chopped
• 1/2 pound frozen hash brown O'Brien potatoes, thawed
• 1 6 oz. can mushrooms, drained and chopped
• 1 medium carrot, shredded
• 2 cups cooked turkey, chopped (cooked chicken would work just as well. You can use puffin for all I care.)
• 1/4 teaspoon marjoram
• 10 ounces gravy (in retrospect, I feel you could add another 6 ounces and be fine, if you prefer a more gravy-based pot pie)
• 1 can Pillsbury Grand buttermilk biscuits (we used their Sweet Hawaiian. You can use any flavor. Also feel free to use a non-name brand equivalent. I promise not to tell anyone)

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 400F  (200C, Gasmark 6)
2. Heat oil in cast iron skillet. (Don't have a cast iron skillet? Philistine. In that case you're going to need to prep everything but the biscuits in a pan, then transfer to an oven-safe dish)
3. Add celery, potatoes, mushrooms, and carrots. Saute for 5-7 minutes.
4. Add turkey, gravy, and marjoram. Simmer for 2-3 minutes.
5. Lay biscuits over the contents of the pan. (If you're not using cast iron, transfer the contents of the pan to a 9" round oven safe dish and then lay the biscuits down on top)
6. Cook in oven at 400F for 14 minutes or until biscuits are golden brown.

Good Times!