Slow Cooker Apples in Bourbon Custard

    Holy Shit. I'm not one to normally go nuts about something that came out of a slow cooker, but I can say without fear of contradiction that this is the best thing outside of my chili to ever come out of a slow cooker. I just threw this together completely on a goof and magic happened. Seriously, once you have this, you'll forsake all other slow cooker desserts. We're talking eyes in the back of the head, open mouth groaning kind of good. Unless you don't like apples. Then you're shit out of luck. As always, notes are in blue.

Slow Cooker Apples in Bourbon Custard

Ingredients

• 6 small-medium apples, spiral cut and cored (you'll need one of those apple corer/peeler/slicer things or you're in for more work than you want)

  

  This thing. You can find them on Amazon for under $20, or at Pampered Chef for $1,200.

• 1/2 cup chopped nuts (we used pecans, but I imagine walnuts or cashews would be delightful)
• 1/2 cup sultanas (that's fancy-talk for gold raisins)
• 1 14-ounce can of sweetened condensed milk
• 1/4 cup Benchmark Brown Sugar Liquor (if you don't want the booze, just use an equal amount of brown sugar. If you can't find Benchmark, you can mix about 2 tablespoons brown sugar with 1/4 cup bourbon for roughly the same effect)
• 1/8 cup honey
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon

Directions

1. If you haven't already done so, run your apples through that apple corer/peeler/slicer thing. Do your best to get the apple off the spindle whole. You will be scored on artistic merit.
2. Spray a slow cooker with non-stick cooking spray. Place the apples in a single layer on the bottom (we were able to barely fit 6 apples in a 2.5 quart cooker)
3. Mix the chopped nuts and raisins. Fill the middle of each apple where you removed the core. 
4. In a medium bowl (you can use a large bowl if you'd like. I wouldn't recommend using a small bowl unless you like making a mess), mix sweetened condensed milk, honey, bourbon and cinnamon. Pour mixture evenly over the apples. 
5. Cook on LOW for 3 hours or until apples start to get tender and liquid takes on a custard-like consistency. 

Good times!

Caramel Apple Walnut Bread

     Sunday was once again a baking day for me. This time, however, I went with a dessert bread. The original recipe was for a Caramel Apple Bread from Taste of Home Everyday Light Meals. I made a few changes and have to say that I was very pleased with the results. The wife loved it and it's been very well received over on my Facebook page. The bread was moist with a nice crust. What was neat was that the top of the loaf split while cooking, so when the time came to put on the caramel topping, some of it leaked down into the center of the bread.

You can see the caramel running right down the center. It's magical.

     There's a whole lot of changes you can make with this. I imagine you could swap in pears or other firm fruits. Just about any nut could be swapped in or left out if you don't like nuts. As always, I will give you the original recipe with any changes I made or notes in blue.

Caramel Apple Walnut Bread

Ingredients

Batter

• 1 cup fat-free plain yogurt
• 3/4 cup white sugar 
• 2 eggs
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 1/4 cup packed brown sugar (I misread the directions and added this in to the batter. It still came out delicious, so no harm, no foul. It's staying in. Now the recipe is mine! Muahahahahaha!)
• 2 cups all purpose flour
• 2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1-1/2 cup chopped peeled tart apples
• 3/4 cup chopped pecans (I didn't have pecans in the house, and the wife wouldn't have let me put them in there even if we did. I used 1/2 cup chopped walnuts instead)

Caramel Glaze

• 1/4 cup packed brown sugar 
• 2 tablespoons butter
• 1 tablespoon fat-free milk (I used 2%. YOLO)

Directions

Batter

1. In a large mixing bowl, beat the yogurt, sugar, eggs and vanilla. 
2. Combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt; add to yogurt mixture and beat until combined (I totally didn't do it that way. I just threw everything into the yogurt mixture while the Kitchenaid was running. I figure it will all get combined eventually. Whoever said "focus on the journey and not the destination" has clearly never watched me cook.) 
3. Fold in apples and nuts
4. Pour into a 9"x5"x3" loaf pan coated with nonstick cooking spray. Bake at 350F for 45-55 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. (Mine took 105 minutes. One and three-quarter hours. There could be many reasons for this. Maybe my loaf pan was smaller than requested. Maybe my oven is off kilter. Maybe whoever originally wrote this recipe was drunk at the time. We'll never know. Just keep an eye on it after the suggested baking time. You'll know when it's finally done)
5. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pan to a wire rack.

Caramel Glaze

1. In a small saucepan, bring the brown sugar, butter and milk to a boil, stirring constantly. Cover and cook for 1 minute (how can I possibly stir constantly if I just put the damned lid on? The lid's staying off. I'm not a magician.)
2. Cool slightly (this is needlessly vague. I'm thinking somebody at the publishing company needs a whack in the head. Let cool until it thickens up. It should still be viscous, but not runny. We're looking to be able to spread it with a spatula)
3. Spread over cooled bread. Let stand for 15 minutes.