Tuna Ranch Melt Pinwheel

     Sometimes you come across a recipe so hilariously Middle Class, it begs to be made. This is the sort of recipe you know will end up at pot lucks or brunches across the Midwest. The ingredients are Middle Class staples: Bisquick, tuna, ranch dressing, American cheese. I kid you not when I tell you the wife and I had to wait a few minutes to eat this because we were laughing so hard when this came out of the oven. In its defense, this recipe is super cheap and easy to make, and comes in at around 250 calories per serving. As always, any notes or changes are in blue.

Tuna Ranch Melt Pinwheel
via Betty Crocker 300 Calorie Cookbook

Ingredients

• 1-1/2 cups Bisquick Heart Smart Mix (that didn't happen. I just used the ALDI brand baking mix)
• 1/3 cup boiling water
• 1 can (12 ounces) chunk light tuna in water, drained
• 1/4 cup ranch dressing
• 3 tablespoons finely chopped green onions
• 1 small tomato, cut into 6 slices
• 3 slices American cheese, cut in half diagonally (I'm going to have to insist you go with American cheese, because this thing looks hysterical when it's done. While Muenster or Swiss would probably taste good, you'd be missing out on the aesthetics of the Road Cone Orange you get with American)

Directions

1. Heat oven to 450F. In a medium bowl, stir baking mix and boiling water until soft dough forms. Gather dough into a ball.
2. Place dough on lightly floured surface. Roll dough into 13 inch round. Place on ungreased 12 inch pizza pan (if you have a pizza stone, it works great here). Pinch edge to form 1/2 inch rim. Bake 6-8 minutes or until light brown.
3. Meanwhile, in a medium bowl, mix tuna, dressing and onions. Spread tuna mixture over crust (don't forget to take the crust out of the oven first). Arrange tomato and cheese slices alternately in a pinwheel pattern on tuna mixture. Bake 1-2 minutes longer or until cheese is melted. Cut into wedges.

Good times!

Tuna Casserole from The Wife

This recipe is a guest post from my lovely wife. It is one of my favorites. I turn things over to her.

     I don’t do much cooking in my house. It’s just easier to let my husband cook and tell him how good it is. However, there are a few dishes he occasionally asks me to make. A few nights ago, he had to stay late at work, so he requested I throw together a tuna casserole for dinner. I guess his incessant cooking has inspired me, because I decided my usual version needed some tweaking. Notes are in blue:

Tuna Casserolevia The Wife

Ingredients

• 1-16oz. bag of egg noodles (This was my first tweak. I’ve always used macaroni for my tuna casseroles, but there was a bag of egg noodles in the cabinet – and they were calling to me.)
• 2-5oz. cans of tuna in water (Use more if you like a lot of tuna. This seemed to be the right amount for our tastes.)
• 1-10.5oz can of cream of mushroom soup (Of course…)
• 1 cup (4oz) shredded cheddar cheese
• 2/3 cup of peas (Husband’s request)
• 1 small red pepper – chopped
• 1 small yellow pepper – chopped (We had an overabundance of peppers, and not being a big fan of peas, I decided peppers would both add color and lessen the pea flavor.)
• 1 cup crushed potato chips
• Lake Shore Drive Seasoning to taste (from The Spice House)

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350.
2. Cook noodles according to package directions.
3. Drain egg noodles and return to pot. Add tuna, cream of mushroom soup, and cheese, and stir until incorporated. (In my original version, the shredded cheese was sprinkled over the top of the casserole.)
4. Mix in peas and red and yellow pepper.
5. Add Lake Shore Drive Seasoning to taste
6. Pour mixture into greased Pyrex and top with crushed potato chips. (This may surprise some of you, but I had never made a tuna casserole with potato chips before. The inspiration came from a story my mother likes to tell. My grandmother would always make her children their favorite meals on their birthdays. My Uncle Steve’s favorite meal was tuna casserole with crushed potato chips on top. My mother hated it.)
7. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes or until potato chips start to brown.

Good times!

Too Damned Easy Utilitarian Tuna Salad

     Everybody should have a couple recipes in their personal repertoires that are super easy to put together. Something that takes virtually no effort. I'm talking something you should be able to do blindfolded.

Like this, except cooking blindfolded would be an actual useful skill.

     For me, one of those recipes is tuna salad. I picked this recipe up from watching my mom make it. It's not exactly like hers. My mom makes it with a bit more Miracle Whip, so it's creamier. She also likes to put in a chopped hard-boiled egg. This particular tuna salad does very well on sandwiches and leaves plenty of room to mess around with the recipe. Add, subtract, do what you want. If you don't already have a go-to tuna salad recipe, this should be a solid template to work from. As always any notes will be in blue.

Too Damned Easy Utilitarian
Tuna Salad

Ingredients

• 1 rib celery, diced small
• 1/2 large or 1 medium sweet onion, diced
• 3 cans tuna in water, drained
• 3 tablespoons mayonnaise (or Miracle Whip, or whatever ersatz mayo substitute you enjoy)
• 1 teaspoon pickle relish
• 1/2 teaspoon yellow mustard
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
• 3 dashes Worcestershire sauce
• 1 chopped hard-boiled egg, optional
• salt and pepper to taste

Directions

1. Combine all ingredients in a large bowl. Stir until all ingredients are combined (that's it. There is literally nothing more to preparing this recipe).  

Good times!